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Just writing this out, not sure if I’m going to publish this or not.
basically, I have suffered with panic attacks for as long as I can remember. I get this overwhelming fear of death, and that just being the end, that comes over me. I start to feel panicky, I start to sweat, feel like I need to get outside, I hyperventilate. It’s not great. It also mainly seams to happen in the evenings and at night time.
It had died down for a long time, I’d not had one for ages, then when I was pregnant I started to get a couple, then after giving birth I’ve also had a few (my daughter is 7 weeks old.)
The only people that known about it are my parents (when I was younger-not now.) And my partner. I darent tell anyone. When the health visitor or doctor asks me I always say I’m fine, because it’s not happening there and then. Or it hasn’t happened for maybe a few days or a week, I can kid myself that it won’t come back, but they always do. I’m also frightened to tell people, especially now, because I’m frightened they will take my baby away from me. I’m frightened they will think I am an unfit mother. Even now, I feel like I need to justify myself on here, by saying that it’s never caused any harm to my baby. If I feel one coming on, I make sure my baby Is with her dad in another room and I lock myself away. Because they happen in the evening I’m lucky there is always her dad there.
anyone else suffer from this? Or just me? Anyone got any useful tips? Would appreciate it.
Firstly I can safely assure you not a soul on this earth would take your baby away from you. Nobody. Panic attacks are so common and many people suffer from them in all kinds of situations. People have different triggers. Mine are anything to do with maths, pressure, and public transport. I completely understand your fear of thinking someone will take your baby away. I didn’t have panic attacks as such when my daughter was born but I did have this almighty feeling she was going to be taken away, anxiety. Either by illness, sudden death, medical professionals and even her father which I hate to admit. I just felt like it was going to happen one way or another, so I kept her close and was very over protective.
I can honestly say the best thing you can do that will benefit you hun is to see your doctor or speak with your health visitor. You will soon get huge relief when you realise all they want to do is help you, and that won’t be taking your baby, not at all. They will give you the support you need and even give you some options that you can choose from to do as you know yourself best. Don’t be afraid to seek some help. You can totally do it.
You can speak with us all any time. Talking and expressing how you feel is so important. Never keep things bottled up, there is always someone available to speak with here. You don’t need to justify yourself, we get it. Sending a huge ginormous hug your way <3
All the best,
i myself also suffers with anixity and panic attacks I have also suffered with pnd to! When I first suffered with one when I had my first daughter I never knew what it was at one point I even drove myself to a&e thinking I was having a heart attack! I felt very ashamed and thought people would want to take my baby away from me to!! Many people suffer with this I was really surprised when I had my second daughter I really opened up about all that I was feeling and going though this really helped me and it will for most people! It’s like a weight off your shoulders! Please don’t suffer in silence tell your health visitor or go to your gp they can offer support or may give you something to help! I’ve just had my baby boy 6 weeks ago and towards the end of the pregnancy I was getting a few! Then when I gave birth I was having horrible ones I was in hospital for 4 days due to a tromactic birth which really didn’t help! Like you I get them because I’m scared of death any time I’m ill I panic! Don’t feel alone Hun talk about it!! There is help out there! I’m now back on a lower dose tablet that helped me before and I feel so much better now! I really know how you feel but there is a light at the end of the tunnel! Just remember your not a bad mum no one will take your daughter away! There is also an app you can download called Sam!! I hope this helps and remember your not alone!!
I agree with what the other ladies have said no one will take your baby away I promise you. Becoming a Mum is over whelming in itself but then when panic attacks are brought into the mix it’s even harder. I have experienced what you are going through and I felt like I couldn’t tell anyone I was completely ashamed as I didn’t feel ‘normal’. But having panic attacks is nothing to be ashamed off and please don’t feel scared to share with us on here as so many of us know exactly how you feel. If you feel up to it I would see your GP just to talk things through. This doesn’t mean medications necessarily but they could refer you for CBT which helps to change your thought process in regards to your anxiety. But please keep talking about it though, on here, to your family, it will help so much believe me. Take care xx
I have suffered panic attacks since i was a teenager and honestly the best decision i made was being honest with my health visitor. They aren’t there to judge you (even if we as mother’s feel they are.) I was so scared to be labelled an unfit mother but instead i have a support network thanks to being honest with the health visitor and doctors. Don’t be afraid to ask for help xx
Sweetheart, if Channel Mum only really ever helps one person then for me, it will be worth all the effort and time we have put in. I feel you may that person. Let me tell you why. When I started Netmums, one of the main reasons was to help other mums with depression and anxiety. By ‘help’ at that time I didn’t know what ‘help’ we could give except the one message I wanted to get out which is ‘They will not take your baby away’. We spent years working on this and we did a lot of good. I left Netmums thinking pretty much the job had been done. Then I started to hear young mums saying they had felt this way. And that is when I realised the job wasn’t finished. So that is in many ways the whole point of Channel Mum for me. You are the whole point. Panic attacks are overwhelmingly scary but there is so much help and so many things you can do so they don’t become so powerful and so scary and eventually fade out. Perhaps you can print out or write out what you wrote to us here and go to your GP and hand it to him. Keep looking for help, keep talking, until you get heard. I promise you, PROMISE you, no one will take your baby away.
Please will you come back and tell me how you got on? I will be thinking of you
Hi. Firstly I want to say AMAZING!!! You have taken the first step in getting the help that you need and deserve! Look at the responses, no one is judging you, everyone totally empathises and gets it. No GP, health visitor, social worker or health professional is going to take your child away and I say that from a health professional background. Having panic disorder does not make you an unfit mum in fact, it makes you a highly sensitive Mum who undoubtedly puts your kids and probably everyone else in your life before yourself! So let’s do a reality check and get rid of that misconception you have about asking for help!
Your fear of death is not uncommon, but it’s nasty to have and when you suddenly have kids or become aware even more of your own mortality and that can cause an exacerbation of the disorder, add to that exhaustion and all the other things having a new baby creates and precious controlled mental health issues can return.
It sounds as if you have done a great deal of work on your panic already…you just need a little more help to get over it completely…and you can get over it….I absolutely promise.
The shame you feel about your mental health concern is COMPLETELY unnecessary, the reason we know how to treat panic disorder is because many fabulous and talented people struggle with it! That is why the # at channel mum is you are not alone!!
So, first steps, if you can just talk to those you love about how you are feeling, it’s a great practice for when you speak to your GP
Ask your husband, friend or parent to go to the appointment with you so that you feel supported (when you’re ready)
Try distraction techniques when bad thoughts enter your head. Just pick something up…like a pencil and think of as many things it can be used for, this breaks cognition (thoughts) and helps to stop the build up to panic attacks, whilst interrupting the negative thoughts.
These can add some ammunition on your bad days!
And finally, keep talking here, because it is ok, to not feel ok!
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